Overcoming Anything

Overcoming Procrastination with Barbara Stone

• Anne Vryonides • Season 1 • Episode 17

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Episode 017: Overcoming Procrastination with Barbara Stone

What if procrastination isn’t a bad habit… but a signal? A sign that something deeper needs attention—clarity, courage, or permission to become who you really are. In this episode of Overcoming Anything, we explore the emotional, mental, and practical layers of procrastination and how to finally move through them with intention.

Barb Stone’s path to “success” wasn’t linear. After 20+ years in senior leadership, she realized she was living someone else’s definition of success—and began studying resilience, positive psychology, and coaching. Today she’s a leadership development coach, TEDx speaker, and bestselling author who helps people redefine success on their own terms and create lives that actually feel aligned.

Key Takeaways

  • Why procrastination is rarely about time—and almost always about fear, clarity, or identity
  • How to build structure, routines, and momentum when you feel stuck
  • The simple 4-step morning routine that helps you beat procrastination before the day even starts

Timestamps

  • 00:00 – Welcome & Barb’s mantra: “Grasp the nettle”
  • 03:55 – Success on paper, unfulfilled inside
  • 10:30 – The calling that became impossible to ignore
  • 17:45 – How curiosity helped Barb push through fear and procrastination
  • 24:20 – Creating structure when your calendar suddenly opens up
  • 31:50 – The 4 steps to starting your day with intention
  • 40:15 – Advice for new entrepreneurs and anyone stuck at the screen
  • 46:00 – What Barb learned about herself on the journey

Connect with Barbara
Website: barbstone.me
 

Recommended Resources

If you found this episode helpful, please share it with someone who’s struggling with procrastination and needs tools—not judgment—to move forward. Your shares, follows, and reviews help this show reach the people who need it most.

Credits
Host: Anne Vryonides
Guest: Barbara Stone

Disclaimer
This podcast is for educational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional, medical, psychological, or financial advice. The views and opinions of guests are their own and do not reflect those of the host or the Overcoming Anything podcast.

Please follow, download, and rate Overcoming Anything so this podcast can reach the people who need it most.
❤️ Anne

 

Speaker:

Welcome to Overcoming Anything, the podcast where we dive deep into stories of resilience, transformation, and growth. I'm your host, Anne Vryonides and today we have an incredible guest who has overcome procrastination. I don't know if you ever overcome procrastination, but she definitely has the tools and tips to help guide you through it. So joining me today is Barbara Stone. She is. A TEDx talk speaker, an Amazon bestselling author, a coach, a speaker, a trainer, and her specialty is that she guides people on their journeys to their best selves by helping them find clarity in their struggles. So welcome to the show, Barbara.

Speaker 2:

Thanks Anne. Thanks for the introduction. It's so good to be here.

Speaker:

Excellent. So before we dive in, I always love to ask one question. So what's one quote or mantra that keeps you going in tough times?

Speaker 2:

Wow. This is something that I learned when I was in junior high on Long Island. I had this amazing social studies teacher, and he always came up with these great sayings. And one of the things he always talked about, he taught us a story about grasping a nettle, when things get tough. What is a nettle? A nettle is a prickly plant. When you grab hold of it, it hurts. So whenever I have these struggles and challenges going in my life, it's like I grab hold of it and it hurts. But you, because of the hurting, you are able to maneuver your way through it and learn and get better on the other side.

Speaker:

I like that. So instead of running away from the hurt, you run into it and just grab it and go for it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, you have to. It's because I think a lot of times people are afraid of doing things because it's, they don't know things or it's gonna hurt things, it's gonna hurt them. It's because it's some, it's an unknown and that's. Normal. But one of the things I believe is yes, grabbing that hard hurt and moving forward, and also bringing the people along with you, your friends, a coach, a therapist, whatever you need to be able to overcome that challenge and that struggle that you're going through.

Speaker:

I love that reframe of, challenges that you're facing in your life. Just grab it.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker:

So let's go ahead and start at the beginning. So what is the most difficult thing that you've procrastinated on that eventually you overcame?

Speaker 2:

Yeah. I think I'm gonna say the, one of the biggest things was we have in our culture here, you're supposed to go to college. You're supposed to get that job. You're supposed to, climb ladders, get married, do that whole life. And it's because it's, you got to make money so that you can live, you can do better. And I think that, after I had gotten my MBA, I got into manufacturing. So I, obviously I'm a female and I was in that land of manufacturing, which is for the most part a male environment. And it's like I really struggled on finding my voice and who I was because I always had somebody looking at my back. I always had to be better, and I always worked harder, worked longer. And I, did I climb the ladders? Yes. I eventually became an executive vice president, CFO was to take over a company and I ended up going is this what it's all about? But how do I leave this? This was a big challenge for me, and it's like. I needed to start taking a look at what was really important for me. And I, feel so grateful that I have spouses that have gone along the journey with me and allowed me to do what I needed to do. And I needed to do a discovery. I needed, I, I took a class in, resiliency, then positive psychology. And this is all while ongoing I'm working. I then eventually got involved in the John Maxwell leadership program and became a coach, speaker, trainer, and I'm going like, wow, there's more for me to do. And so I started thinking about becoming an actual certified coach. Again, going back here, it's like, oh no. How can you do this? You need to. Do that career thing. And, I had to find clients and when I sent, I call this the coming out letter and letting everybody know what I was doing and finding clients. And I get a lot of people going what is wrong with you? So it was a big challenge. It was a mindset. A mindset shift that I could try this and, um, and I stepped into it. I stepped into the unknown.

Speaker:

That's so brave. So what made this particularly challenging for you?

Speaker 2:

It was because of all that I had learned that, you're supposed to be, in this job, making money and saving money for retirement and doing the same old, same old. And but I wanted to, there was a calling inside of me that said, there's more for you to do. Yeah. And sometimes there's that voice that we just don't listen to, and I had to start exploring it and I had to do a discovery of it, and that's what I did. And it was very sticky, but it I wanna end up saying I, in constant learning, constant movement, constant. Challenges and constant, like all of a sudden I get stopped and it's, I need to be able to just get to the other side.

Speaker:

That's great. So when you were working as a vice president in a very successful position, yet feeling super unfulfilled, and you're just like, oh my gosh, this just feels impossible because you've heard the calling when you don't answer, it gets louder and louder until it's actually screaming in your ear. So how did that feel and who was there to support you during this time?

Speaker 2:

It was there and what's amazing is so Frank, my current husband, he was there to, you know, I just go, I, I need to do something. And I wanted to explore it. And it's really interesting because I truly believe that God and the universe send us signs. That you need to step into. So we had gone to Kripalu, it's a retreat center in the Berkshires in Massachusetts to hear an author speak. And I picked up their catalog and it's like eye candy to me about all these different courses. And I saw this course about crafting the resilient life.

Speaker:

Mm.

Speaker 2:

And I ended up thinking I've been through a death of my first husband. I've been through alopecia, I've been through all the changes in manufacturing. I've dealt with that. I'm resilient.

Speaker:

Yes, it's, you definitely

Speaker 2:

are, you know, but it's like, oh, but there are tools. That I can learn to be more resilient. And that was the start of my journey. And so it was a three month program. It was an immersion in the beginning and the end. And that got me going, that got me thinking about what else is there, uh, for me to do.

Speaker:

And so what was the process that you used to transfer or transition, I guess I wanna say out of manufacturing, out of that job into. An opportunity on your own with this newfound empowered resilience.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so it was a leap. So all you know, this started, this journey started about three years before I left, so it wasn't like. An automatic thing. Okay. I studied, the resiliency I got involved in positive psychology because it's like focusing in on what's working as opposed to what's not working. And then, so I, what's happening now is I'm changing my mindset to more of a growth mindset and a possibility mindset. And then I got involved in John Maxwell. And that's where I got my first dabbled in, in coaching. And I'm going, I really have been a coach all my life in manufacturing because I went into so many different areas that I was not. I'm not an engineer, I'm not a quality person. I ran a, one of the largest heat treating facilities in the Northeast. But what I did know was how to bring people along and how to ask the questions to help move them forward. So I'm starting to think about, it would be really good to build on this so. I'm now starting to work with a coach and then I, in 2018 decided to go for coaching classes to be able to start thinking about becoming an A certified coach. And so I did that and in 2018 and then working with this coach, I finally said, alright, I think I'm gonna take that leap. My last day of work I was going like, oh yeah, I'm now free. I'm now free. And then when I got on the other side of the new year, 2019, it's going, oh my gosh, what did I do?

Speaker:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

cause it was a whole new me. I didn't get up in the morning, go to work, I didn't go out to the plant to see what was going on. Putting my finger on production shipments because I ended up seeing everything that was from customer service to shipments and everything in between. And I'm going like, oh, now I gotta try to figure out how to sell myself. And trust me. There were so many times I wanted to run back and I will tell you, so I got involved in any networking meetings. There's a women's center in Syracuse here. There's A-W-B-O-C-A Women's Business Opportunity Connection in he in Syracuse, and I signed up for that. And so I started exposing while I, in 2019, I was. Going for my coaching certification. Now that I had my training, I needed to get myself out. I needed to meet other women in the community. I needed to start finding some clients. And I'll tell you, I'll never forget I went to this WBOC meeting. And one of the things, I have a speaker and then later on they ask everybody to go around the room and tell a little bit about who they are and their name of their company and what they do. I had walked in at the end because I just didn't wanna, I was new and I was, oh, I was so scared about meeting people and saying what I'm up to, and they find by the time they came around to me, there were probably at least a dozen coaches, speakers, trainers, or consultants in the room. And they got to me and I'm going, oh my goodness. How can I call myself a coach, speaker, trainer in a, in the middle of all this greatness? But I did. Did I? Good for you. I felt like I wanted, yeah, I wanted to like slide under the table, but what I did was I proclaimed that's what I was going, that's who I am. And as you, I really find that as you start proclaiming who you are, you can really start stepping into that, and that's where you go.

Speaker:

That is amazing. I love that. Let me ask you though, just hearing your story, you seem like a very ambitious, driven woman. Woman,

Speaker 2:

crazy woman.

Speaker:

So it doesn't sound like you have a problem with procrastination. So if you do, how did you overcome that in order to chase your dreams and to go for it?

Speaker 2:

Yeah I'm going, I think that. Sometimes when we're procrastinating it's because we don't necessarily have a plan. Things are really unknown. And there's a fear of failure. But there, what helped me was I had this internal thermometer that kept on saying, you need to do this. I. You cannot fail. And that was what was driving me. And, but one of the things is my, I think is a detriment to me is I am curious about life, about different things, and I want to experience. And I wanna experience them. So I think with the procrastination, as much as I was fearful, didn't have a plan, so many things were unknown. I was curious, tell me more. Let me do a little bit of research. Let me do a little bit of discovering and really start honing in on. Who are the right people for me to talk to? So I really think that my curiosity really helped me overcome my procrastination in getting myself moving.

Speaker:

That's a great perspective because I can't imagine, like you said, you resigned from your position and all of a sudden you have all this open space on your calendar, you're all of a sudden you have to market yourself and there's no clear path ahead. So how did you transition out of that time and how did you just push yourself to keep going?

Speaker 2:

So one of the things. When I woke up the following morning, I realized that, oh my gosh, there's so many things going on around the house. I have two dogs that bring my attention. There's laundry, there's cleaning, there's everything that I can look at. All the other peripheral things in my life that can take up time. As opposed to what was gonna put me in the direction. So I ended up saying, so what was it about my work life that created structure to be able to learn and to grow and that was going to work. So what I did was I got an office. I made an office.'cause this was pre. Pandemic. I had, when I first started, I had coaching clients, one in California, one in, Germany. So I had to learn Zoom. But the rest of them, all I needed to have an office. So I had the office so that they could come in. But what I did was I made myself go to work and I worked on developing my practice. There instead of staying home. So I would have more regular hours. I put some structure in place and I think that's important to, as you start, potentially procrastinating or getting, some struggles or challenges. It's what can you do to structure yourself And because all of a sudden I had all this free time and I was always used to. Filling that time and I needed to fill a time that was going to be quality work that was going to help me to grow this. So what I did was create my office, saw clients there, and then also did a lot of networking and really meeting a lot of people to be able to, structure that I could overcome the, these challenges that I had. And then it, you know, Ann, as we've talked, you know, I think like I, and I mentioned to you, sometimes I go, if I had told. That girl, that little girl seven years ago, that she would be doing all of this, that she would be this successful coach, speaker, trainer, that she goes into corporations, companies. Trains them, coaches them so that they can be their best. I work with the Y Center now, helping female entrepreneurs move themselves forward and put out that. And then being a TEDx speaker and being, an Amazon bestseller author, I would've said, you are nuts.

Speaker:

So is that some advice that you have is to talk to your inner child, is to go back and say, Hey, we got this. I'm gonna hold your hand. We can make it through.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. I now, yes, I wished I, and I want that inner child to see, yes, that you've created this. And the thing about it is I'm not done. I also end up thinking that, and that what I did was I surrounded myself with people that saw the possibility in me.

Speaker:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

And ended up helping me move forward, open doors. I mean, even in the manufacturing world I had leaders. Business owners that saw a potential in me and I never had to put my shingle out and try to find a job because they came after me. They saw the potential in me and the ability to create, because I'm always a creative person. A solution knowing what the problem is and the solution to move things forward, that they knew that they could count on me. So it's like I needed to practice that myself.

Speaker:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

With a different mindset that yes, I can do this and I will find the right people to help move me forward.

Speaker:

So what advice do you give those young entrepreneurs that you mentor who wanna start their own business and they, maybe they don't have the money to go get an outside office, so how would you recommend they get that structure and not procrastinate?

Speaker 2:

So one of the things that, i've taught like strategic planning classes and I teach business plan. And one of the things I really I start out with new entrepreneurs. I want them to dream a little bit.

Speaker:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

And I want them to think about what it is. That they want, if they were to Laura, this, it's a, it's called the Laura King exercise, and I've learned it over, applied it. But it's about writing for four days in a row as if you were your end of life, and that everything has gone as well as it could have. Right. About that.

Speaker:

Wow.

Speaker 2:

What is it that you want? It's so powerful because we, you know what? We don't give ourselves a chance to dream. We don't. So I ask them to write about it and I want them to discover about themselves. And then the next thing that I do is I ask them to watch the little video, a 20 minute video, of Simon Sinek.'cause he talks a lot about, getting to your why. But in this video he talks about, the golden Circle. It's not what you do, it's not how you do it. It's why you do it. And for me, yes, I'm a coach. And that's what I do, speaker, trainer. How I do it is asking lots of powerful questions to be able to unfold things. But why I do it is because I needed that discovery myself, and I want to be able. To help people find that own their own discovery of being the best that they can be. Life is full of opportunities. And then the last exercise, what I do, and this is just to get the brain juices going, is to start planning. If in three, five years you want to start achieving some of this dream, what are some of the steps that you need to take? Because a lot of times. New entrepreneurs want to go from zero to a hundred and trust me, that's what I wanted to do.

Speaker:

Yeah. I'm sure most of our listeners are thinking that.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. I remember my first coach, he ended up telling me, oh, you just need to post on social media seven to eight times a week, and you're gonna get three clients a month. I'm going, OMG, let me just slip my wrist. But when I, and I needed to find. My way of doing it, my way was networking and getting out and speaking to different people. And it's about, starting, it's about looking at that dream and knowing. That you're gonna take some risks, you're going to fail, but there is no failure because it's only learning. You're gonna learn from those mistakes. And let me tell you, I have learned so much. I'll never forget, like some of my first, conversations to bring on new clients, and I'm always thinking, oh, I gotta, I'm a coach and you just need to hire me, and then I'm gonna, but no. And I failed at it. Yeah. And so I finally found somebody who made some sense to me as, it's not, it's a conversation. It's not you selling due to get, so there's a lot of learning that goes on and not being able, be afraid to learn.

Speaker:

So if someone has their dreams and they know what they want and let's say on a day-to-day basis, so they've, they have the big picture, they have the action steps, but. One day they're just sitting at their desk, staring at their screen. How do you, or what tips or suggestions you have to overcome procrastination in the, those dirty down detailed moments.

Speaker 2:

Yeah. Yeah. So let me, I. You, you started talking about the day, one of the things and if people were to go to my website, Barb stone.me, sign up for my newsletter, I give you the four tips for getting up and going in the morning.

Speaker:

Okay.

Speaker 2:

And, and this has helped me with the procrastination and it's number one, because what you're doing is being grateful. That's number one, being grateful for what you've got going on in your life. Even when you feel you don't have anything to be grateful for, you are grateful because you got up in the morning.

Speaker:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

And you can find things because gratefulness expands. And if you do that, it just expands your persona and it reaches out into all different aspects of your life. The next thing is to do some prayer or meditation. Take a moment just to sit still. We don't sit still.

Speaker:

Mm-hmm.

Speaker 2:

And listen to what comes to you. Because it may be gold for you and you sometimes you need to listen to what is coming to you because you're you can't see it. The third thing is to read something inspirational because one of the things talk about procrastination. When we got up during the pandemic. We were just like, what do I do now? How do I go to work? How do I be? We looked at our phone, we go to TV and we were like, we went to, we went down our, all these different rabbit holes because we don't know the sky is falling.

Speaker:

Right?

Speaker 2:

And it's what it was during that time that I really started saying, I need to read something inspirational to get me. Up and going and setting my intentions and focusing for the day. And that's part of the reason I had read a lot. But that's part of the reason that I wrote this book so much to drool about Lessons for Living Large. And it's through the eyes of my Great Danes, but I'm taking those stories and I have little wisdom statements on the bottom because I want people. To be intentional about what they're doing during the day and that they can overcome that.

Speaker:

That's great

Speaker 2:

advice when you've done, when you've done these three things, then look at your schedule for the day and start intentionally saying, I'm gonna show up to these things. I'm gonna take what I've learned and I'm gonna be intentional about my appointments and intentional about. Filling the space that's still open. That will help you get out of the procrastination mode because you have done some good work on yourself and you are setting that intention of learning something new during the day and being able to know what's going on. And, on the reverse side, at the end of the day, there's four questions, or I have clients ask these questions. But I also, at the end of the year or after a project, it's like reviewing what worked. What didn't work, what you, you learn From what didn't work and what do you need to change So that. You can build upon that learning. So you can start the day there and end the day with some reflection.

Speaker:

Some. That's some great tips there. I know. I'm really good about that, about having a strong, powerful morning routine because you have to get into alignment to really set yourself up. So thank you for sharing that. So looking back, what is the one thing you learned about yourself having gone through this whole experience of leaving the this great job and transitioning as an entrepreneur and overcoming your procrastination?

Speaker 2:

There's so much of life to see and experience. Do it. Live your life as if you. We're living it with a new day, new eyes, seeing different things, different possibilities, because there's so, there's such a richness in doing that and being in the present moment that you, you. You'll miss so much of life if you just stop, keep moving even when you're not too sure which direction to go in. Find. Just take that step and the step will build upon the previous steps and before you know it. Oh,

Speaker:

you're a new person. You're reaching your dream.

You're

Speaker 2:

new person.

Speaker:

Yes. Yes. So other than your book, is there a book that has helped you on your journey that you could recommend to our listeners?

Speaker 2:

Oh wow. I'm gonna tell you, there's just a book that I just finished reading. There's so many different books. It's by one of my, mentors, Maria and she's called it the the Generous Exchange. And it's really about, it just came out this year. It's just about being really in the present moment overcoming challenges. And she really talks a lot about, what happened in the pandemic and then everything going on now in the world. But it's like. You can affect what you're doing. There's that. There's one of the inspirational books that I read was I, Seth Go Godin, the Practitioner. That was really great for me to learn a lot. Um, but then also my coach Rick Tamlin wrote a book called The Bigger Game. And if you are really thinking that you're gonna be stuck. You're not stuck. He takes nine different, um, things that came up in coaching and he put it on like a tic-tac toe board and you're always in movement, so you're recognizing where you're at and move. So those are three weeks that I really would re.

Speaker:

Okay, fantastic. This has been such an inspiring, conversation, Barbara. Thank you so much for your time and for sharing your journey with us. So where can people connect with you, follow your work, and learn more about what you do?

Speaker 2:

Yes, I can go to Barb stone.me find out about who I am, what I do. You'll also see a lot of podcasts, but you'll also learn about drool. So much to drool about Lessons for Living Large. This book, it is available in Barnes and Noble, Amazon. And it's meant to be something inspirational for you to read in the mornings.

Speaker:

Sure, we'll go ahead and, link your socials, your website, and your book down below. So if you found this episode helpful, please be sure and share it with someone who might be facing procrastination right now in their life. And they need to hear this message of inspiration with Barbara's tools and tips. So don't forget to subscribe and I'll see you next time on overcoming Anything.